Top Ten Failed Force Powers

10. X-Ray vision: for checking out what the other gender jedi were hiding under their robes. Banned by Yoda (something to do with small-man's complex).

9. Super-Complaino-Power: the ability to complain one's way out of any tough situation (see Luke Skywalker)

8. Insect Repellant: ability to generate an insect repelling force field

7. Rejection Perception: ability to see if opposite gender will reject or accept a dinner date proposal before the proposal is made (this way, the studly line, "you could use a good kiss," would be met with something other than, "I'd just as soon kiss a wookie."

6. Coffee Warming Power: ability to warm a cup of coffee with hands (or other small snack items sorta like a microwave).

5. Ability-to-see-sith-coming-out-of-thousand-year-hiding-and-start-taking-over -galaxy-power: (see TPM)

4. Ewok-Exploding-Power: deemed too close to the good side/bad side borderline for universal use.

3. Nookie-stamina-increasing-power: really tried on this one, ladies, and is still in development today. requires lots of practice with a willing partner...

2. Extra-sensory-clitoral-proximity-locating-power: (goes with three) 'been trying for THOUSANDS of years on this one, ladies, and haven't given up yet, rest assured. Your urgent requests have kept it at #2 again. It remains one of the great mysteries of the Galaxy. In fact, its probably because so much jedi mental resource was being used to develop this power that #4 failed. Could be, you never know! Stop throwing stuff at me!

1. Bad-joke-protection



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