You Might Be A Rednick If... (Part V) think a 'cursor' is someone who swears a lot. think a computer hacker carries an axe. think a hot tub is a stolen bathroom fixture. think a subdivision is part of a math problem. think cur is a breed of dog. think mud rasslin' should be an Olympic sport. think people that send out graduation announcements are show-offs. think that Dom Perignon is a mafia leader. think that John Deere Green, Ford Blue, and Primer Gray are the three of the primary colors. think that potted meat on a saltine is an hors d'ouvre. think the Mountain Men in Deliverance were just "misunderstood". think the internet is a new fishing tool. think the last words to the Star Spangled Banner are "Play Ball..." think the vowels are E..I..E..I..O. think those yellow traffic signs that say "Slow children at play" means the kids in the area are not too bright. think your IQ is the number of coons you shot out of season. use a 55 Chevy as a guest house. use a pig for a garbage disposal. use the O on a stop sign to sight your new rifle. use the same tree your dog does! use your fishing license as a form of I.D. wake up the day after your wedding to find your sister next to you. wake up with chocolate in your ears after spending the night in a fine hotel. watch "The Dukes Of Hazzard" and have to find someone to explain it to you. watch Little House on the Prairie for decorating tips. were conceived, born and taught on a pool table. were shooting pool when any of your children were born! were shooting pool when your kids were born. won't stop at a rest area if you have an empty beer can in the car.'re 42 and still have clowns come to your birthday party.'re a lite beer drinker, because you start drinking when it gets light.'re an expert on worm beds.'re considered an expert on worm beds!'re mowing your lawn and find a car.'re turned on by a woman who can field dress a deer.'re wearing a camoflauge jacket and dipping in your driver's license pic.'ve ever bathed with flea and tick soap.'ve ever been arrested for bootleggin'.'ve ever been arrested for loitering.'ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a dog!'ve ever been involved in a custody fight over a huntin' dog.'ve ever been kicked out of the zoo for heckling the monkeys.'ve ever climbed a water tower with a bucket of paint to defend your sister's honor.'ve ever entered yourself in a "Howdy Doody Look-alike" Contest.'ve ever filled your deer tag on the golf course.'ve ever financed a tattoo.'ve ever given a set of Tupperware ice tea glasses as a wedding present.'ve ever held somebody up with a caulk gun.'ve ever hitchhiked naked,'ve ever made change in the offering plate.