Retiring MailmanA 65-year old mailman decided it was time to retire. When the small commmunity he worked for found out, they decided they should do something nice for him, since he'd served them for the past 45 years.
So, the last day on the job, the mailman went up to the first house, and the homeowner welcomed him in. They gave him a pile of presents to thank him for all his hard work.
At the next house they gave him a cheque for 100 dollars, and the 3rd house, a cheque for 200 dollars.
At the fourth house, a blonde lady answered.
She was wearing silk pajamas, and was motioning him to follow her upstairs. the mailman had the best sex of his entire life, and when they were done, he went downstairs. On the table was a huge breakfast, with waffles, eggs, pancakes, the whole deal, and a cup of coffee with a 5 dollar bill underneath.
The mailman was curious, so he said to the lady, "I've had the best day of my entire life, everyone has been so nice to me, but I have to ask, what's the 5 dollar bill for?"
The lady replied, "I asked my husband what we should do for you and he said 'fuck him, give him five bucks', but breakfast was my idea."