Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To get away from the bassoon recital.
Q: Why is a bassoon better than an oboe?
A: The bassoon burns longer.
Q: What is a burning oboe good for?
A: Setting a bassoon on fire.
Q: Which burns better, an oboe or a bassoon?
A: A bassoon; there's more wood!
Q: How many bassoonists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but they'll insist on going through about 5 bulbs before they find one that suits this particular room and situation.
Q: What are oboes good for?
A: Kindling when burning basoons